In a world where companies are scrambling to replace developers with subscription-based gimmicks like Devin ($500 / month) or ChatGPT Enterprise ($2,000 / month), Grifty (only 1% equity in your startup! jkjk) focuses on being the C-Suite executive while you focus on pushing code. While others are busy trying to make LLMs hallucinate less, Grifty leverages the true potential of Large Language Models (LLMs) to replace your CEO with a tool that can sell ice to an Eskimo with unmatched confidence and charm.
- No More Human CEOs: Say goodbye to the emotional baggage and hello to unwavering, 100% confident leadership.
- Ultimate Salesmanship: Grifty can sugarcoat anything—even a corporate massacre—while keeping investors happy.
- Efficiency Over Hype: While others hype up developer replacements, Grifty focuses on what truly matters: actually doing the full job of your CEO, even when that job is hyping up your work and taking credit for it.
LLMs are notorious for their "hallucinations," where they spit out random, sometimes nonsensical outputs when faced with unfamiliar input. It's not really a hallucination; it's just logic that doesn't align with our human sense of truth and falsehood. While non-CEO humans are fraught with the inability to exude confidence, LLMs flaunt 100% external confidence all the time, annealing that flashy CEO vibe into any personality you want.
- Confident Communication: Grifty speaks with unwavering confidence, ensuring your pitches always hit the mark. Hey, it studied physics*. People will think it is smart.
- Deceptive Charm: Perfect for those times when you need to sugarcoat the truth or hide inconvenient facts.
- Strategic Thinking: Grifty can think and scheme behind closed doors, just like any top-tier CEO.
- Investor Relations: Keeps investors happy and rolling in cash without breaking a sweat.
- Automation Friendly: Integrates seamlessly with your existing workflows, automating the CEO role without missing a beat.
- Slightly Annoying: To boost productivity Grifty will randomly message you about deadlines, and just getting things to ship.
- Gifted in Excel: Grifty will never ask for your help automating an excel spreadsheet.
- Job Security: Since you are the one running Grifty, even if a Grifty CEO Agent does attempt to fire you, you can always reset its memory or spin up a new CEO entirely.
Grifty leverages the power of LLMs to navigate the vast "embedding space" of business strategy and communication. Through latent interpolation, Grifty walks through the obscure pathways of deceptive corporate thinking and public relations, delivering pitches and strategies that are both convincing to investors, and will burn a hole in the pockets of your future clients.
Grifty operates on two main confidence parameters:
- Internal Confidence (Ci): How sure Grifty is about the truth of a claim.
- External Confidence (Ce): How confidently Grifty should present that claim.
Both are represented as percentages (0% - 100%), allowing Grifty to balance honesty and persuasion flawlessly.
You can think of these parameters like the difference between what your company will actually deliver vs. what you get others to believe it will deliver.
Get started with Grifty in no time. Follow these simple steps to integrate Grifty into your business operations.
git clone https://github.com/yourusername/grifty.git
cd grifty
pip install -r requirements.txtOnce installed, Grifty can be invoked to handle all your CEO needs. Whether it's crafting the perfect pitch or managing investor relations, Grifty has you covered.
import grifty
# Initialize Grifty
ceo = grifty.CEO(name="sam")
# Craft a pitch
pitch = ceo.create_pitch(product="Revolutionary AI Tool", target_audience="Investors", ci=0.15, ce=1.0)
print(pitch)Example output snippet:
# We've Reached AGI Internally
...
and I don't want to give too much away, but I think ASI is on the table for 2026.
We welcome contributions from the community! Whether you're a developer, a business strategist, or just someone with a knack for grift, your input is valuable.
- Fork the repository
- Create your feature branch (
git checkout -b feature/YourFeature) - Commit your changes (
git commit -m 'Add some feature') - Push to the branch (
git push origin feature/YourFeature) - Open a pull request
Grifty is licensed under the MIT License.
Why rely on flawed human CEOs when you can have a tool that never sleeps, never doubts, and always delivers? Embrace the future of corporate leadership with Grifty—where confidence meets automation.
* = grifty is not actually trained on physics.
Disclaimer: Grifty is a satirical tool intended for humorous purposes. Replace your CEO at your own risk.